Sunday, March 28, 2010


I always struggle to come up with things to say in my monthly letters
and the minute I publish them I think of a ton of things. Some of
these things are old but I want to have them jotted down somewhere.
A lot of times I read someone else's blog and it triggers a memory so
that's where some of these things are coming from.

Says "dwangwus" for dangerous
Says "me-wow" for meow

insists on getting in the car by himself. he can't do the carseat
buckles so I still do that for him but he likes to "help" me close
the door.
can open the fridge door. our fridge is on the top so he can't
actually get anything out but he insists on opening it.

OK, so it wasn't exactly a ton but I'm sure I'm forgetting more again.


Today was "one of those days". It started with some butter fingery
moves that involved dropping things including a half carton of eggs
that landed on Jackson's large dump truck before smashing on the
floor. The best part was the egg being in all the nooks and crannies
of the truck and the time I had to spend cleaning and sanitizing it.
I'm sure I bumped into a few things. Then I went to Target and when
I got home couldn't find my wallet anywhere. I called the store and
they had it there THANK GOD!!!!! So I picked it up on my way to a
birthday party with the kids. At the birthday party Madison had a
hideous meltdown RIGHT as everyone was singing happy birthday. I'm
so happy that her screaming is going to be on their home video for
all time. I have no idea what set her off but I could NOT get her to
calm down. I had to bring her outside because I felt bad subjecting
everyone else to it. She kept screaming that she wanted to go inside
and I explained that if she stopped crying we could go inside. She'd
stop crying then the second we stepped foot in the house she would
start screaming again. I ended up putting her in the car and leaving
her alone (while standing outside the car out of her sight) for about
4 minutes. That seemed to do the trick and we were able to go back
in and enjoy the rest of the party. I was apologizing to my friend
who really didn't know what I was apologizing for because it was no
big deal to her. I ended up shedding a few tears (which is like
hysterically crying for me) so I knew I was really stressed out.

I've really been not myself lately. With the kids being so difficult
I've found my patience (which I usually have an overabundance of) to
be absolutely gone. I notice myself sighing and groaning and being
short with the kids when they ask for something. I HATE that I am
like that. They're good kids and i love them to pieces and I don't
want to get in the habit of talking like that with them. But it's
literally one thing after another with them. "Want milk!!!" Get up
to get milk. The minute I sit down, "want crackers!!!" Get up to
get crackers. The minute i sit down, "wanna watch mickey." Get up
to turn on Mickey. The minute I sit down, "mama, hold me!!!"
AAAAAGGGGHHHHH!!!! I know I signed up for this in a very
enthusiastic way and I really can't complain but I seriously had no
idea how hard they could actually be. I just want our lives together
to be happy and not filled with aggravation and annoyance. Any advice?

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