Binkies of hope

I may have told this story before but if so it was a while ago. Plus now that we have children here safe and sound, I can't help but think of it and feel like the luckiest people in the world.

Throughout our years of trying to have a baby, we never wanted to jinx ourselves by buying something for a baby. We figured if I was never able to get pregnant, that item would be a constant reminder of what we couldn't have though we wanted it so badly.

After almost three years (probably just a little over a year ago before I started my first round of IVF), I realized that was a very negative way to think and figured we could use a positive reminder of hope. We bought a package of pacifiers at CVS. It was small enough that it wasn't in the way and to be honest it got shoved in our bathroom cabinet and I forgot about it.

After 4 very disappointing months of IVF treatments and 4 months off before another treatment we finally got the news we had waited to hear for over three years. I was pregnant. A few weeks later we found out that both embryos we transferred were still there and alive. I was pregnant with two!

Probably two months after that, I remembered the binkies we had bought. I went rummaging through the bathroom cabinet to find a package of TWO binkies. I know not everyone believes this, but it was at that moment that I knew all we had been through was meant to happen exactly as it did.

Now we are blessed with two amazing, beautiful children for those two binkies of hope.